The Hiatt Household - Nearly a Year On...

I haven't written much of anything in the last year. Work has been too stressful, and I've been struggling with a lot of illness.

I got incredibly sick after my knee surgery, and really didn't start to get better until recently. All kinds of little things (and some not so little). I had surgery again, this time on my sinuses, as it turns out I had a congenital defect that left me almost unable to breath through my nose. All this time I thought it was allergies...

I was already struggling at work, but this really threw me over the edge - I hadn't wanted to be an account manager, as I really preferred the technical bits and the behind-the-scenes bits, but got promoted anyway, and for a while I was able to keep up with it. Finally, a little earlier this year, I called my manager and told him I didn't think I could keep going with the job, and could he move me to another position? As it turns out, they couldn't, and I've now left Atypon, quicker than I wanted to, but the universe has a funny way of showing you where you need to go, and this was one of those times.

Enough of that. Yesterday, also for the first time in months, I got out my beading stuff and took up a necklace project I'd started back around Christmas. I finished it finally, and then I took one of my favorite necklaces, which I'd originally made with the stretchy clear rubber-esque string. I've been afraid it would break for some time now, as it's getting old, so I took it apart and remade it with nylon-coated steel, only I lengthened it, and then decided it's way too long. I'm going to take it apart and re-do it one more time, a little later on today... and wow, I've got the time to do that now. I've also got a bunch of cool pendants that I'd like to try to make into necklaces, and I think I'll try that later on today as well.

Nothing planned except job search - my (now ex) bosses were extremely cool - I really can't say enough about all the things they did to help out as I was leaving), and paid for me to see a career consultant. I've got the first of my seminars on Monday, and my first meeting with my consultant on Friday.

I lied, kinda... I said I hadn't been writing. Actually, I've got my travel trailer stored at my in-laws' place in Morgan Hill (Thanks, John and Doris!) and I've been going down there every Saturday, spending the night, and writing all day Sunday. So, actually, I lied a lot. I've been writing most weekends. At this moment, I've got the selections picked out for my portfolio. They just need some polishing, and I can create the actual portfolio and start sending it off to agents.

And... this morning, I had the most fascinating dream - essentially, I dreamed out a whole story, as I've done once before. I wrote out the dream so I won't loose it - in it, I was a witch who could shapechange into a hawk. I won't bore you with all the little bits, but I dreamt a lovely conflict and a lovely nemesis, and a wonderful hero, and everything.

Okay, that's all for now. Toodles!

State of the Union, 'n Shit...

Okay, short and sweet cuz I always get too involved.

Had knee surgery finally. I got sick of gimping around,and finally bit the bullet, signed up for the whole bullride. The doctor shaved the meniscus a bit, cleaned up some crap floating around under my kneecap, and shortened the muscle on the outside of my knee, so that my kneecap will track better. Jeff says the two little holes with their jaunty little stitches make my plump little knee look like a smiley face. Guess I married the right guy. He gives spectacular "glass-is-half-full".

I've been on my butt, mostly in bed, for almost a week now. General anesthesia was every bit as horrible as it should be for a control freak. Tomorrow is the "all-clear" appointment, and then I'm off to physical therapy, and back to work.

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Elise has come in just now to tell me that "Elise" is actually her secret identity - in reality, she is SaberGirl, who has expert smelling, expert roaring, and expert hunting as her superpowers. It's easier, she assures me, to track down bad guys that way...

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Going to drive up to see my almost-90-year-old Auntie Irene at the end of July.

This is all about my dad's side of the family. My Uncle Ron (dad's brother) and Auntie Janet (siser-in-law) are coming, and their daughter Samantha, my cousin, whom I ain't seen in way too freakin' long. My sister Carla, her husband Jerry and their daughter Katie are also gonna be there. I'm hoping to borrow their tent and camp for a few nights at my favorite campground, Cassini Ranch. I may just give in and get a hotel room with Carla and Jerry, but I'm holding out my hopes for camping.

That's, of course, provided I can drive at all...

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Other side of the family, my mom's sister, my Auntie Dar, is moving back from Celina, TX about mid-Sept. I've said I'll fly out to meet her, and help her drive back. This is going to be part adventure for me and part assistance for her, both monetary and physical. She's not the spring chicken she once was, and aprox 1600 miles is more intimidating than it used to be... She wants to wind up somewhere near historic Cottonwood, California.

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As if the whole bad health thing weren't getting enough help, I'm now displaying all the symptoms of a sinus infection. What the hell? This is my fourth this year - I think caused by a bad tooth. Now I have to work up the courage to go to the dentist and submit to THAT kind of surgery. Freakin' A! Figures.

glassishalffullglassishalffullglassishalffullglassishalffullglassishalffull...

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Got Some Change?

Cuz we could all use a little change, as the song goes.

I love my job. I really do. I like everyone I work with - I've made some good friends there, and that was surprising. I had forgotten the friend factor that a good job can bring with it.

I love what I do. It's challenging, and there's room to grow, and my boss is supportive and stands up for us when we need him to. I get respect from my co-workers, and my boss, and my clients, the academic publishers I support.

But... (And you knew there was one of those, didn't you?)

But I'm doing the job of about 4.5 people. We've been asking for help since the beginning of this year, and the guys at the top of the food chain aren't listening. The president of the company is an engineer, and, like most engineers, thinks that everybody else in the company is just so much dead weight. He's been heard to say this at upper-level management meetings. We don't get bonuses, we don't get respect, and we don't get any help.

So, with a huge amount of regret, I'm sprucing up my resume. Probably should have done this a while ago, but you know how it is, hope springs eternal. Oh well.

Going to the Sabercats game tonight. They're playing the Tampa Bay Storm - some chick singer is going to be playing halftime, and the game is sold out, probably as a consequence. Ashanti? I have no idea who that is, but then I'm astoundingly unclued about such things. You'll have to forgive me.

On the "Ericka's Busted Bodily Parts" front, I'm finally getting an MRI next Wednesday. Thank God. I'm sick of being incapable of climbing stairs with both legs. I can't walk more than 10-15 yards before I start limping again. I can't ride a bike, I can't exercise, and as a consequence I can't lose weight. I've been really depressed, imagining the long years of my life stretching ahead, unable to get around without the aid of a motorized scooter. After a year of limping everywhere I go, I finally got the doctor to understand that I wanted to finish losing my weight and then go and finish my blackbelt, and that no, a cortizone shot in my knee was not going to assist in any way with these goals.

Okay, I'm off to go get groceries and some stuff to take to the game tonight.

Ciao!

Gray Skies Are Gonna Clear Up...

It's been so long since I've written regularly, that I'm trying to get back in the habit...

Hence, today's excerpt from the life of:

Went to work, immediately got horrendous allergies. In my office we have two "conditions" - the Atypon Knee (several people have had bad knee injuries, including me) and the Atypon Sneeze. This is, I swear, the worst. It seems like it's mostly where I'm sitting - everybody sneezes, and we all say "God Bless". I think it's the air conditioning or something, making everybody sick. All I know is I was outrageously sick last year when I started, and this lasted throughout Spring, and now it's happening again. I walked in to work feeling fine this morning, and ten minutes after I got there, I could hardly breathe. One of my coworkers came in, sat at my desk, and said she could hardly open her eyes, they were stinging.

So I worked like this until 4:30pm, when Jeff and Elise came to pick me up. Elise drew some pictures on my whiteboard - a smiley face heart, as a matter of fact, with the words "Mommy I love you". As stupid and saccharine as this sounds, I really do sit back and stare at these pictures at work and they make me feel better.

It was a pretty good day. Cold as hell, which is so weird at this time of year, but a good day nonetheless. Elise made me dinner tonight, from paper shapes she cut out in red and blue. I was in the bedroom doing my html homework - Java Applets, yah-freakin' hoo - and listening to the soundtrack from "Oh Brother Where Art Thou" - I've discovered in myself a certain leaning towards Bluegrass, who knew? She came in with a "plate" and a "spoon" and some construction paper fruit and vegetables. She proclaimed it a "healthy meal" because she had cooked fish and other healthy things. I chowed down. I then returned the favor and made her two hotdogs, and some steamed veggies. We each had a few sips of rootbeer. I cut out some pink construction paper bats.

We're winding up our night now. Elise has watched "The Cat in the Hat" three times tonight already - welcome to the reality that is childhood. It could have been worse, believe me. At least at seven, she's pretty much outgrown Barney.

Back to the allergies for a moment - plans have been made to rip up all the carpet in our incredibly tiny mobile home. I'm actually very happy about this. It sucks to have carpets and pets at the same time, and the people who lived here before us raised puppies, and not carefully, if you take my meaning. It's much easier to keep a Pergo floor clean,and there's no carpet pad to go moldy. Elise's room will come first - this weekend we're going to clear everything out of it (and piling it in the living room is our only option at this point, so life is going to be hell for a while), pull up the carpet, put down the Pergo, paint the walls, and then Jeff's mom Carol has promised to buy Elise a bunkbed from Ikea, complete with a cute little canopy.

Now fess up: wouldn't you have killed for something like this when you were a kid? We've looked at this thing in the store, and it's like sleeping in a little starry cave. Elise is beside herself with excitement.

Ack. It's late again. I swore we'd be in bed by 8:30pm, and it's 2 freakin hours later already.

Gotta boogie. Ciao fer now...

Things have been rough...

I like my job, but I hate that it takes up all my time and energy. I'm online now, as I sit here writing this, trying to finish a presentation outline and working on an end-user support inbox that's up to 500+ emails. I've got three people to help me, but two of them are new, and the other one has been shang-hai'd (wow, how DO you spell that?) to work on other stuff. I'm sitting here writing this out, on a blog I've made no entries for since freakin' January, and I'm feeling guilty that I'm not still immersed in work crap.

Sigh.

A few thoughts:

You thought the Village People were bad? (Well, okay, not BAD precisely, but bad enough that gays and straights alike hold a soft spot in our hearts for these guys. So bad, anyway, that they've become iconic. More on that later)

Well, here's Gregorius, with his gosh-golly-durn best rendition of YMCA.

(Hint: I'm imagining a big plastic globe in front of me. Now I'm giving it a spin. My finger jabs down. I've chosen the country I wish to carry onward the torch, the banner as it were, for our beloved Village People.

It is NOT Finland...)





Okay, back to seriousness for a moment here. Sorry, but I must. Everything's a struggle lately. Work was bad for a while - we had a manager that, while the nicest person in the world, had no clue how to actually manage people. All kinds of weird shit became my fault, or Samantha's fault, or James' fault, or Eleni's fault. You get the point. There was an emphasis on bureaucracy that bordered on the comical and made all our jobs harder. There were other things I don't care to try and elaborate on. My job consisted of responsibilities for two or possibly even three.

That boss has gone, and we have a new boss, not quite the same as the old boss. He's a young guy, but very good at what he does, and at least capable of listening when we talk and believing that we can't be at fault for things we have no control over. The atmosphere has eased a bit, and may ease further as time progresses. We will have to see. I'm still doing the job of possibly three other people.

I'm probably being stupid. I'm staying for what I can learn. They're paying for me to take XML and HTML classes. I've learned a lot about online publishing. I guess that's worth it.

On the home front, as it were - I've started following the San Jose Sabercats. Yah, yah, I know, how "Prole" of me, and when we go to the games, it really does jar lose an awful sense of being anesthetized by smoke, mirrors, fireworks, extremely loud rock music, and a borrowed sense of glory when the Sabercats score against the other guys...

The first time we went with our neighbors, I thought it was going to turn out to be like pro-wrestling. You know, as in FAKE. It turned out, on the contrary, to be amazingly good football, condensed into a smaller space. The game strategy is a bit different - there's less time spent running the ball and more emphasis on passing. A few of the rules are different, but for the most part, it has all the best of football with none of the bad stuff, like freezing your ass off or sitting in the rain - games are played at the HP Pavilion, which is an extraordinary place - there's not a bad seat in the house.

It's usually Elise and I going - we have our tote bag of paraphernalia that we take: the huge ass cow bell for making lots of noise, the gold pompoms so Elise can be a cheerleader, the huge foam Sabercats claws (one for each of us), and our earplugs, because you do NOT want to go to one of these games without earplugs.

Other news: Money is still very tight. Jeff is going to be taking classes in Electrical Engineering, but he has to wait for a DC class in the fall. Meanwhile, he's still painting miniatures as fast as he can, and we're managing to pay bills, but we have no leeway whatsoever. Last week I was at Whole Foods buying groceries with Elise, and the transmission on the truck starting having problems. I couldn't get it to stay in 2-wheel drive, and had to drive home at 35 miles an hour in 4WD. That was not amusing, and Lord knows, I'm scared to death to take it to the mechanic.

Ummm. What else? I'm seeing an acupuncturist now. I fell on my right knee almost exactly a year ago and it's still not healed, so I can't walk to the lightrail without getting very stiff and limping. Still got a bonespur on my left heal, and last week I had a back x-ray that revealed I have the beginnings of arthritis in my lower back. I'm on medication for pre-diabetes, I get migraines all the time, and I haven't been able to lose weight in months.

The acupuncture has helped, it really has. I have more energy now, and I feel better, but still...

When did I get this freakin' old? What the hell is going on? I've had to let go of some plans - I guess I won't ever be going back to finish my black belt now, and I'm not even sure how to keep going with Weightwatchers since I really need to exercise to lose weight, and I can't walk, can't ride a bike, can't do anything that involves bending my knee, and now can't even kayak because the truck is busted and I need the truck to carry the kayak.

Sorry. Whining, I know. This is just the latest incarnation of my mid-life crisis, and I really have no idea how to deal with any of it.

And now my daughter Elise is hungry. What a little bottomless pit she is - growing like a weed, 7 years old, and she never walks anywhere she can run. I've entered her in a kid's race - Pat's Run - which she's going to run with her cousin Katie.

Okay, if I don't get her some breakfast, she's going to rise like a volcano. Ciao!